Many Voices Press “How to Find Social Support”

May 16, 2010

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Many Voices Words of Hope

How to Find Social Support

Everyone needs a network of social support that does NOT depend on a therapist. "Social support" is simply "making friends."  People who grew up in traumatic surroundings often don’t know where to start, or how to form friendships that last. We feel socially awkward, or afraid of others. For many of us, acquiring social skills takes a lifetime. But even if we stumble sometimes, the rewards are worth it.
Some peer groups concentrate on recovery and therapy issues,such as those we have listed on MV’s "Links" page. Incest Survivors Anonymous, AA, Al-Anon, Narcotics Anonymous and similar organizations have meetings in most areas. You can also create your own group through meetup.com You’ll probably want to take it slow about disclosing your problems in groups like this…get a feel for the membership and who seems "safe," before pouring out your life history.

quilts

Quilting groups are just one  of many creative activities that can lead to lasting friendships and support.

But social support is not just "24/7 recovery." Make a point to include "normal" activities and friendships in your life. Look for FUN!  Try exploring one or two different types of activity every week or month, just to see what feels right for you.

The possibilities are truly endless: choose a creative activity (sewing, quilting, knitting, fixing cars or boats, taking a drawing or sculpture class.) Improve your physical health (exercise groups, walking, biking, dancing, Weight Watchers.)

Libraries are great places to seek out those with similar interests: book clubs, genealogy groups, history buffs. No matter what your religious and spiritual beliefs-or NON-beliefs-people who think as you do are out there-you just have to find them. Try checking out different places of worship or the local atheists’ group. Find out first-hand what you like or don’t like.

Make a difference in your community. Get involved in local groups-political or otherwise-that share your values or opinions. Sports, card-playing, collecting stamps or coins, environmental organizations like the Sierra Club, animal rescue efforts, vegetarian or cooking groups, fishing contests…the list could go on and on.

Social experiments may lead to pleasant surprises. See the sidebar for a great example of this!

Be sure to send Lynn a report of your latest social experiments.
We’ll publish them in a future print newsletter!

PeonySml.jpg

When I garden in my front yard  neighbors stop to talk.  They smell the peonies…

…and the roses. Soon, we
become friends!

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Social Experiment Success!

MV reader Kathy A. describes her recent social experience: holding a garage sale!
"The garage sale was more than money to me. I was able to go out and talk to people. I heard their impressions of our stuff (not always great) but we didn’t take it personally. We were able to separate "us" from "it." 
Also I got rid of a lot of stuff, stuff we would never have parted with earlier in our therapy. All in all, it was good for us."

And for you? You’ll never know until you try.

Survivor/Activist/Musician Michael Skinner has donated copies of his three CDs: "Pirates", "Train of Tears", and "Waitin’ for a Train" to MANY VOICES for fundraising. Listen to the music at his website, then contact Lynn by email or phone (513) 751-8020, to order your preferred CDs for $12 each, shipping included.  We will have a Paypal page up soon, but it’s not ready yet. 😦

MANY THANKS to The Trauma Disorders Program at SHEPPARD PRATT for renewing its ad in Many Voices Multiple Choices (MVMC), our Printed Resource Supplement. In addition to its renowned trauma program, Sheppard Pratt also offers a specialized center to treat eating disorders.

The Sheppard Pratt Trauma Program was founded and is led by Richard J. Loewenstein, MD, a prolific author and tireless advocate for appropriate treatment of traumatized clients. His treatment team for adults is exemplary, and is notable as well for its child and adolescent unit, coordinated by Joyanna Silberg, PhD, a pioneer in the study and treatment of complex trauma in children.

When you contact Sheppard Pratt or any of our references, please mention that you found them through MANY VOICES!

CASH FLOW is still frustrating at MV. (Maybe for you too!) We understand this is a tough economy. We deeply appreciate whatever you give!
DONATE NOW VIA PAYPAL

If your hospital or clinic is interested in advertising in our MVMC supplement, contact Lynn. We’d love to help you offer MV readers quality  health care services!  

LET US KNOW WHAT YOU WANT FROM MV, TOO!

PLEASE send feedback to me directly. We hope you’ll want to view our future editions, but if not, just unsubscribe at the bottom of this message, and we will follow your request.  

JOIN MV FANS ON FACEBOOK HERE

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ISSTD Conference Registration is NOW OPEN!

ISSTD’s 27th annual conference will be held October 16-18, 2010 at the Atlanta Hilton Hotel. 

The theme for this year’s meeting is "Clinical Consequences of Complex Psychological Trauma: Assessment, Treatment and Recovery."

Plenary addresses:
Does Child Abuse Permanently Alter the Human Brain?
Martin Teicher, MD, PhD, Associate Professor of Psychiatry, Harvard Medical School
Developmental Trauma Disorder: A New Diagnosis for Childhood Interpersonal Trauma
Bessel A. van der Kolk, MD, Professor of Psychiatry, Boston University School of Medicine

NOTE: Pre-conference workshops will be featured on October 14 & 15, covering treatment for traumatized couples, complex trauma, children and adolescents, and much more.

  HELP YOURSELF and MV Too!
Thanks to the generous gift of donated copies by author Jane Wegscheider Hyman, this excellent and inspiring book is offered to MANY VOICES’ readers at a discount: Only $15 per copy, including media-mail shipping to all US destinations.

From the book jacket: "The women in ‘I Am More Than One’ are living proof that you can find new sources of strength through family and friends, build a rewarding, successful career, and still hold on to your own unique identity." These messages of hope and encouragement are essential reading for people who want to learn how to survive and thrive despite painful histories of trauma and abuse.

Dr. Hyman is a researcher and writer on women’s health and a member of the New England Society for the Treatment of Trauma and Dissociation. She is the author of several well-received, helpful books.

ORDER YOUR COPY NOW DIRECT FROM OUR WEBSITE!

Or call Lynn W. at 513-751-8020, to order over the phone.

IamMoreThanOne.jpg

I AM MORE THAN ONE
How Women with
Dissociative IdentityDisorder Have Found Success in Life and Work
By Jane Wegscheider Hyman PhD

VOLUNTEERS needed! We still need more web-research for the public education site …so if you like to browse the internet, here’s your chance to help MV while you explore! Also, we want lists of community mental health clinics in your area that might appreciate a free subscription to MANY VOICES.  Please contact me if you can help with this.  Substance abuse facilities, homeless shelters and domestic violence shelters are also logical places that might welcome MV. We want to increase our outreach to the people who need us most. THANK YOU!

Forward this message to a friend!

ASK FOR A FREE SAMPLE ISSUE OF MV– FOR YOURSELF OR SOMEONE ELSE!

PLAN AHEAD! WRITE OR DRAW FOR US !

Start sending ideas for our 2011 Issue themes NOW. Decisions will appear in the August issue, but the more input, the better!
If you’re not sure when your subscription expires, ask Lynn!

You can renew your subscription on Paypal, here.

August 2010: Sexuality: Choices & Dilemmas. Is your partner involved in your therapy? Safely opening up about abuse. ARTWORK: Loving yourself and others. Deadline: June 10, 2010.

October 2010: Dealing With Authority. Communicating with Medical Doctors, Lawyers, Police and more. Share Problems or Successes. Evaluating Physical Conditions vs Body Memories. ARTWORK: Images of Dissociation. DEADLINE: August 10, 2010.

Send NOW ,  & help others heal!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Suggest YOUR ideas for a future SHARING QUESTION. & Respond to the SHARING QUESTION for MAY

Theresa feels like a failure…her life seems out of control. Have you ever felt like that? What did you do to feel better? Let Theresa know there are people who understand…
Please read through the whole list of Sharing Questions, and reply to any, no matter when the topic first appeared. We Love Fresh Updates to PAST QUESTIONS!

At MV, hatMed.jpgwe make every effort to be helpful to people
recovering from trauma and abuse, their families and friends.
We also want to assist trauma treatment professionals who guide people
in recovery toward a healthier, happier life. Please help us perform these
tasks well by sending your suggestions and input, pro or con, anytime.
Call me personally at 513-751-8020. I want to hear from you!
Sincerely,
Lynn Wasnak, aka Lynn W., Editor and Executive Director

Many Voices
PO Box 2639
Cincinnati, OH 45201-2639

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