It’s all about women

September 14, 2010

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Vol. 7

ItsAllAboutWomen.com Newsletter – September 14, 2010

Are you looking for a little inspiration to get you through your week? Then we have just what you need. Check out the ItsAllAboutWomen.com website for information on how to make effective business decisions, insight on how to become a financial grown up, tips for navigating your relationship while starting a business, and so much more. Here’s a brief look at the articles for this week.

This Week On ItsAllAboutWomen.com


What is the Empower 180 Tour?
By ItsAllAboutWomen.com

Coming

To A City

Near You!

Click here

Build your business differently!

Empower180 tour is a one-day opportunity for you to learn, meet, indulge wisdom from global thought leaders, passionate entrepreneurs and celebrity business owners that will Empower you with resources, and tools proven to immediately generate results. – Click here

Leadership Dilemma: Whats A Gal To Do?
By Sylvia Lafair



Did you know that 56% of adults in the United States living in poverty are women? Women can become leaders in their own lives in order to transform their lives and change these statistics.

Become A Financial Grownup
By Amanda Steinberg

Have you ever based your financial decisions on the idea that you should be able to buy what you want? So did Amanda Steinberg until she realized that what she could afford was quite different then what she should be spending her money on.

Navigating Your Relationship and A Business
By ItsAllAboutWomen.com

Starting a business can be extremely stressful – even more so if your partner is stressing about money and the logistics of it all. We have tips to help you successfully navigate your relationship while jump starting your business.

Making Effective Business Decisions
By Shirley M. Mueller


Most people think that emotions hinder rather than help business decisions. Now evidence supports just the opposite – that women’s tendency to make business decisions from a different place than men makes them successful.

How I healed Myself
By Bernadette Greene


Anyone that has struggled to maintain a normal life in the face of a debilitating illness knows what a monumental challenge it can be. Bernadette Greene was able to take her diagnosis of Crohn’s Disease and make a treatment plan that worked for her.


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You Are Remarkable,
The ItsAllAboutWomen.com Team
Dedicated to Making Women’s Lives Even BETTER!
PS If you haven’t watched the short movie, "The One Flaw In Women," please take 3 minutes now to turn up speakers and watch it here:
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Healthy Place newsletter

September 6, 2010

 

You can read the HealthyPlace Mental Health Newsletter online if you wish.

Hello,

Here’s what’s happening on the HealthyPlace site this week:
http://www.healthyplace.com

Record Numbers of Children Taking Psychiatric Medications

Growing Numbers of Children Getting Antipsychotics and Diabetes Medications

Psychological issues and youth obesity were the biggest contributors to that, according to the 2010 Medco Drug Trend Report. Medco Health Solutions is a pharmacy benefit manager, with the nation’s largest mail-order pharmacy operations.

Medco reports that 2009 also ushered in new indications to existing psychiatric medications and other drugs that traditionally treat adult diseases:

  • Abilify — for irritability associated with autistic disorder in children aged 6 to 17
  • Seroquel — for schizophrenia in children aged 13 to 17, and for acute manic episodes in children aged 10 to 17 with bipolar I disorder
  • Zyprexa — for schizophrenia and for acute mania (bipolar I) in children aged 13 to 17
  • WelChol, Crestor — for low-density lipoprotein (LDL) cholesterol reduction in children aged 10 to 17 with heterozygous familial hypercholesterolemia
  • Atacand — for hypertension in children aged 1 to 17
  • Axert — for acute treatment of pediatric migraine
  • Protonix — for erosive esophagitis in patients aged 5+

Prescription medication use rose nearly 5 percent in children in 2009, four times higher than the growth in medication use in the general population. The drug categories showing the most significant growth among children are diabetes, ADHD, antipsychotics, asthma and heartburn medications. ADHD drug use surged 9.1 percent; children’s use was up, but the largest increase was among young adults 20-34.

One thing that’s helped contain rising costs is the number of medications that have gone from branded to generic. Adderall XR, Topamax, Depakote, Neurontin and Lamictal are included here. In the next 3 years, Medco says some of the blockbuster drugs, like Effexor XR and Lexapro, will be going generic providing more cost savings. And getting your medications via mail order is another way the health plans are saving significant money. The number of people doing that has risen substantially.

——————————————————————

Mental Health Experiences

Share your thoughts/experiences on the rising number of children receiving psychiatric medications, the costs of psych meds, or any mental health subject, or respond to other people’s audio posts, by calling our toll-free number (1-888-883-8045).

You can listen to what other people are saying by clicking on the gray title bars inside the widgets located on the "Sharing Your Mental Health Experiences" homepage, the HealthyPlace homepage, and the HealthyPlace Support Network homepage.

If you have any questions, write us at: info AT healthyplace.com

——————————————————————

"Recovering From A Relationship With A Narcissist" On HealthyPlace TV

For many people involved in an intimate relationship with a narcissist, trying to recover from the aftermath can be very difficult. To learn why this is and the steps to recovery, watch this week’s HealthyPlace Mental Health TV Show.

Watch the interview with our guest, Sam Vaknin, author of Malignant Self Love: Narcissism Revisited, currently featured on the HealthyPlace Mental Health TV Show website until next Wednesday; on-demand after that.

Next Week on the HealthyPlace Mental Health TV Show
  • Adult ADHD Diagnosis and Treatment: Reasons Why Sometimes, Things Go Very Wrong

If you would like to be a guest on the show or share your personal story in writing or via video, please write us at: producer AT healthyplace.com

For previous HealthyPlace TV archived shows.

From HealthyPlace Mental Health Blogs

Your comments and observations are welcomed.

Feel free to share your thoughts and comments at the bottom of any blog post. And visit the mental health blogs homepage for the latest posts.

Coaching Children To Confidently Adapt To The Challenges Of Change

A parent writes into "The Parent Coach," Dr. Steven Richfield:

"Our kids avoid change and shun anything new. They are both getting ready to start new schools and we don’t know how to help them."

If you find yourself in a similar situation where your children have difficulty adapting to change, here’s Dr. Richfield’s advice.  More parenting tips on other child and adolescent behavioral and mental health issues.

Latest Mental Health News

These stories and more are featured on our mental health news page:

  • A Weird Way of Thinking Has Prevailed Worldwide
  • Why Are 20-Somethings Taking So Long To Grow Up?
  • The Ravages of Alcoholism: Who Deserves A Liver Transplant?
  • Disasters Especially Tough On People With Disabilities, Mental Disorders
  • Anxiety Linked to Substance Use Problems in Bipolar Disorder
  • Children at High Schizophrenia Risk Have Reduced Cognition

That’s it for now. If you know of anyone who can benefit from this newsletter or the HealthyPlace.com site, I hope you’ll pass this onto them. You can also share the newsletter on any social network (like facebook, stumbleupon, or digg) you belong to by clicking the links below. For updates throughout the week, follow HealthyPlace on Twitter or become a fan of HealthyPlace on Facebook.

Thank you,
Deborah

Community Partner Team
HealthyPlace.com – America’s Mental Health Channel
"When you’re at HealthyPlace.com, you’re never alone."
http://www.healthyplace.com

This message was sent from HealthyPlace.com to ladyjztalkzone@msn.com. It was sent from: HealthyPlace.com, 12951 Huebner Rd No. 780063, San Antonio, TX 78278. You can modify/update your subscription via the link below.

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Lavender Magazine

September 5, 2010

 

Empowering

Lavender Sisters

Breaking the Isolation, Shame & Silence

All you need for recovery

is a Will and a Way

sisters books

sisterhood

mentors

music

healing

Can’t afford/get to a therapist

Mary is the second daughter of Thomas Blige, a jazz musician, and Cora Blige, a nurse. Her older sister, LaTonya, also is a singer. The family lived in the Bronx until her father abandoned them, then they moved to a public housing project just north of New York City.

“We lived in the ghetto,” Mary says. “I’d hear women screaming and running down the halls from guys beating up on them. People chased us with weapons. I never saw a woman there who wasn’t abused. It was a dangerous place. No one wanted anyone else to get ahead.

When I was 5, sexual stuff was done to me. My mother was a single parent, a working woman. She left us with people she thought could be trusted. They hurt me.

After that happened,

I thought: "It was somehow my fault."

Parade Magazine, published: 01/23/2007

to help

by Karen Duncan

this is what you

have to heal from …

The frequency with which you blamed yourselves for the abuse, carry guilt about exposing the perpetrator, feared family retribution and the ease you recognize the confusion you experienced within the family’s maladaptive belief system.

"that’s it – in a nutshell"

but it will take you

a lifetime to achieve

Have they been treating Me Insane or Sexually Abused?

Yes, I have been labeled with two mental illnesses (major depression and that condition I like to call Chronic Shock Syndrome/PTSD "aka" borderline) but who really is the "crazy one."

I just passed a major milestone in my personal life.  I confronted my mother with the knowledge that she allowed and covered up my father’s sexual abuse of me when she was pregnant with my brother 40 years ago.

Funny thing is, no one, from a national mental health organization, two therapists, or my husband was helpful in this last healing step.

The

Real

Secret?

It took 43 years for me to figure out.  You’ll never remember the sex if you were too young to put it into context, but you will remember the warped adult rules and their excuses; that will be proof enough.

More >>>

It was crazy-making behavior, and I was doing it to myself.

There have been many times in my life when I have been totally lost and confused but would not admit it.

I thought my life had to be hard; after all, I was ugly and bad. I struggled through one badrelationship after another.

I struggled to manage my life rather than live it. I believed struggle, hurt, and pain were the natural order.

I knew how to take a punch in life, and I was determined not to be knocked down even when I was on my knees.

I would survive with my extremely negative internal self-dialogue, I would beat myself up for who and what I was and was not, what I had and had not done, what I did and did not own.

Externally, I tried to prove to myself and the world that I was more than I actually believed I could ever be.

More > > >

In the beginning: abuse is delivered by the those who should have been there to comfort, to protect.

Physical, emotional, sexual abuse are familiar denys  of childhood years for all too many children.
And, of course, there’s the cover up — bury the memories deep, hide the pain, live in desperation and unending solitude — a hard place to live, a hard place to leave, a hard place to survive.

Because no one really wants to know the truth. No one wants to look too closely at just how tragic the effects of abuse are. 

Survivors of abuse live in a cold, dark world. Traumatic memories come in snatches of emotion, in body memories, in moments of inexplicable terror.

The children of abuse break into fragments. Little pieces rattle around inside trying to connect to the whole: one fragment carries the memories of the abuse, another the fear, another the anger.

Code of Silence:

Beneath the American Dream

chronicles in poetry Jenny’s journey from being sexually abused as a child to embracing life and and love as a woman.

Learn More >

Negative Views of the non-abusing Mother


In childhood sexual cases, the non-abusing parent (usually the mother) is often seen as a colluder, helpless bystander or victim.  These negative views may be based on misconceptions about incestuous families and can lead to treatment bias and neglect of the other "victims" of abuse.

Pelletier & Handy (1986) suggests that there are three representative incestuous family types:

Possessive-passive family – the father rules with complete authority, sometimes by force are often described as "manipulative, impulsive, dominating, and unpredictable: and tends to marry immature or insecure women who can be kept emotionally and financially dependent.  Such women are often unavailable for their children emotionally or have a physical disability.

Marriage between Dependent Man and a Domineering Woman – these women tire of being the "mother" to their husbands and withdraw from their spouses emotionally and sexually. 

Frequently these women are cold and rejecting of their children.  They are often absent from their home and therefore unavailable to protect their children.

Union of Dependent man and Dependent Woman – neither is able to fill the other’s overwhelming needs.  Inadequate as parents and spouses, they look to their children for parenting.

A significant number of mothers of CSA victims have themselves suffered abuse as children. 

Excerpts from Janet D. Felgenbaurm’s, Negative views of the mother after childhood sexual abuse. Published in Women’s Mental Health.

More > > >

Thrivers tell us what works for them?

It’s call the Lavender Sisterhood and they send me all the latest trends, their accomplishments, and articles that advanced their understanding so that you can enjoy eBites of what is exciting a new.

Sisterhood

It’s call the Lavender Sisterhood and they tell me about their books, their speakership, and eBites about their experiences with new drugs, laws, understanding what it means to the first in the "Wild West" of new approaches.

Latch on to

what works for you

Have you ever had someone look at you as if your story is beyond comprehension?  Our Sisterhood already knows how that feels.

Do you feel as if they don’t have any idea what if feel like to be in your shoes?  Our Sisterhood already knows how that feels.

So don’t hestitate to come join us for a chat about anything in this eMag or that is on your mind ….

Join us on Facebook

the healing

tools of nature

Finding therapy among Earth’s mightiest friends.

As such, we owe it to ourselves and to God to respect and honor the bounty of the earth. The Creator has placed at our disposal a wealth of natural energies that are willing and useful healing tools. We need only ask, and the help is there for us.

Trees

These mighty friends are elemental symbols of wisdom. They are tangible signs of transformation and growth. Trees are receptive and energizing.

They stand as symbols, representing and demonstrating our endless source of supply. Imagine that every tree you pass on the streets or roads is a demonstration of the things you can be or have in your life.

There is no shortage of possibilities in life, and every possibility is within your reach. We can also talk to trees, particularly elms and oaks. Weeping willows are eager receptors for our sorrows—they take our tears and transform them into beauty!

Trees are a solid support system.

An excellent clearing ritual can be performed at the foot of a tree. Dig a small hole in front of the tree or near the roots. Lie flat on the earth and talk directly into the hole.

Talk as though you were speaking to a person. If you are expressing pain, sorrow, fear, and so on, tell the tree exactly what the cause is and how you feel about it. If you are making a request, be specific.

More nature

therapy >

Understanding

Your Mother’s

Limitations

Mothers of this generation of women did not have the information we have today; they did not readily have the opportunity to seek help or talk to someone about what was happening to them as children. 

Their trauma occured before they were effective laws to prosecute abuse, shelters for victims, therapy programs in their community, and media exposure on the topic of abuse.

reviewing your

family legacy


healing technique

Our mothers were, in some ways still are, one of the most silent generations about this trauma.

She has learned from her father-to keep the abuse a secret- was taught to her as a means of protecting him, not her or her child. 

She learned as a child to maintain the silence of the perpetrator and the family belief system of denial.  She was not taught how to keep herself safe or that she deserved to be protected. 

She lacked confidence in her own beliefs, perceptions, and convictions about sexual abuse and thus continued what the family believed was appropriate.

More >>>

On the front cover is me coming out of the tunnel of darness into the light.  One of the goals of the book is to go back and help other victims and survivors to make it out into the the light too.

I hope as  more victims and survivors speak out about their own personal stories, there will never be  another person who has to feel alone in the process.

My father started training me early on to be his personal play thing/ sexual slave.  I had been sexually molested as an infant.   My mother sent my two brothers and myself to my grandparents to safety.  I did not live with my father he would come to get me.  He came after me when I was 15 and told me he waited til I was old enough.

At the hands of my father, I was physically, emotionally, sexually, spitually and financially abused.

More > > >

Meditation Tapes

ONLY USE FEMALE VOICES

with affirmation tapes and meditation because you are trying to substitute your inner voice with theirs through repetiton.

A male voice sounds

like an abuser telling

you to calm down

and minimize

the situation.

Runaway Love


Mary J Blige

Enough Cryin’


Mary J Blige

No More Drama


Mary J Blige

Good Woman Down


Mary J Blige

Take Me As I Am


Mary J Blige

Click on her to see video

What’s Love Got to Do With it


Tina Turner

Rain on Me


Ashanti

I Will Survive


Gloria Gaynor

This message was sent from Melissa Moreland, Cathy Gipson, Linda King & Patty Rase Hopson to ladyjztalkzone@msn.com. It was sent from: Melissa Moreland, Linda King & Patty Rase Hopson, 33oo N Loop 336 W #528, Conroe, TX 77304. You can modify/update your subscription via the link below.

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September 5, 2010

 

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PAVE

PAVE Newsletter

Shatter the Silence of Sexual Violence

August 2010

In this Issue

:: Binding Project

:: Guys Project

:: Stop the Silence Run

:: Save the Date!

:: Booking for 2010

:: PAVE Library Series

:: Fear No Fashion

:: Rape in the Congo

:: International Day for Male Survivors

:: Angel Rising CD

Dear Jacki m,

PAVE shatters the silence of sexual violence through social awareness, educational outreach, and legislative efforts. By being both prevention and awareness focused, PAVE works on all fronts to end sexual violence affecting men, women and children throughout the globe.
We use art, education and action to challenge cultural norms that encourage violence and ignore the spectrum of sexual abuse.  We create an awareness and response to any injustices victims, survivors and their communities suffer.
You’re invited to join this important work – learn more today!

The Binding Project

The Binding Project Action Kit Now Available!

The Binding Project blends education, art, and dialogue to establish a community of empowerment by creating a focal point for the shared healing and strength of those dedicated to shattering the silence of sexual violence.

The Binding Project seeks to unite people across the United States by empowering them to take ownership over zip tie bindings and other forms of restraint often used by perpetrators as a means of control and power. Victims, their loved ones, and other members of the community will choose to take ownership over these bindings symbolically, spiritually and psychologically by participating in The Binding Project. As part of the Project, each participant will write a word that empowers her or him in times of struggle and adversity on a zip tie binding and wear it as a bracelet.

This complete Binding Project Action Kit is perfect for September, Campus Safety Awareness Month. It contains everything you need from Binding Project materials, instructions and full color flyers. Order yours today!

CLICK HERE

The Guys Project Video

Click Here to View the Video

GabeFrom PAVE’s Male Empowerment Director Gabe Wright…

It is with pleasure to finally be able to share one of my first Video Blog which has been submitted to the World Deaf Cinema festival to take place in DC this Nov.  I will know by the end of the month if it has been accepted.

The purpose of this video was…

1)  To allow myself the opportunity to approach the next stages of my recovery/healing from the PTSD
2)  To introduce The Guys Project and "Hey Man, I Got Your Back" campaign
3)  To begin the promotion of the documentary.

Please do take the time to also sign up to join in the project and also spread the word.

Hope you enjoy the video and looking forward to hearing everyone’s responses! gabe@TheGuysProject.org

Freeze To Stop The Silence

STOP THE SILENCE

Run in the Marine Corps Marathon 10K or full Marathon, or Baltimore half or full Marathon and raise funds for Stop the Silence. To register and for additional info, please contact Lesley Green at 703-989-9234, or

Lesley@m-b-logistics.com

*Look for Pam Pine from Stop the Silence and PAVE’s Angela Rose at the IVAT conference in San Diego as they facilitate a workshop together on Grassroots Campaigns.

SAVE THE DATE

National Sexual Assault Conference

Date: September 1-3, 2010
Location: L.A., California
Purpose: The California Coalition Against Sexual Assault will be hosting the 2010 national conference

Learn more

15th International Conference on Violence, Abuse and Trauma (IVAT)

Date: Sept. 12-15, 2010

Location: San Diego, CA

Purpose: The mission is to provide professional training and information dissemination to improve the quality of life for those affected by violence, abuse, and trauma on local, national, and international levels; PAVE is a collaborating organization

PAVE’s ANGELA ROSE WILL BE THERE!

LINKS

Find us on Facebook

PAVE’s Website

ANGELA’s Website

Angela Rose

Angela Rose’s decade of work on the issue of sexual violence has made her a highly-respected, engaging speaker and expert on sexual assault and violence prevention. She is also widely recognized as an advocate for survivor empowerment. Angela’s efforts have been profiled by CNN, The Today Show, The Montel Williams Show, CosmoGirl, Girl’s Life magazine and in newspapers nationwide.

More info

PAVEs Library Series to Shatter the Silence of Sexual Violence

Did you know that 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys are sexually abused before they are 18 years old? Would you like to help STOP that statistic?

PAVE: Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment is celebrating our 10 Year Anniversary by creating a multi-media library series of violence prevention material. Our first DVD, "Transition to Survivor," has been used by universities and military bases across the country to raise awareness and prevent sexual crimes. WE NEED YOUR HELP to continue this important work.

ANY DONATION AMOUNT IS WELCOME! We offer special perks for donations in these ranges:

  • $100: your name will be listed in the rolling credits
  • $250: Above PLUS a signed copy of the DVD
  • $500: Above PLUS a special thank you on our website
  • $1,000: Above PLUS your name alone paused on screen during credits
  • $2,500: Above PLUS your name or company logo featured on the front of the DVD packaging of our 2 new films, thanked in the beginning of the film, plus at the end in the credits.

CLICK HERE AND PLEASE HELP US SPREAD THE WORD!


Fear No Fashion in Chicago: 10/10/10

Fear No FashionJoin hundreds of participants as Lather Chicago with Agency Galatea present the third annual Fear No Fashion on 10/10/10 with models, dancers, performance art, and local celebrities including TV Host/Model April Rose and TV/Radio Personality Jenner Evans. This event will be hosted by Jennifer Roberts from 101.9 The Mix.

Please come join us for an unforgettable interactive experience because fashion is about feeling Beautiful, Sexy and Empowered! The featured designers are: Borris Powell, Wanda Cobar, Crescendo Apparel, and Anna Hovet. Fear No Fashion’s objective is to promote personal empowerment.

PAVE is celebrating its 10 Year Anniversary – so this year’s Fear No Fashion will be held on 10/10/10! CLICK HERE

Rape in the Congo

PAVE Partners with Hotel Rwanda’s Paul Rusesabagina

Paul - Hotel Rwanda

The Hotel Rwanda Rusesabagina Foundation

was founded by Paul Rusesabagina, the real life hero of the acclaimed film Hotel Rwanda. Rusesabagina, portrayed by Don Cheadle in the film, saved the lives of more than 1200 people during the Rwandan genocide and has been honored internationally for his heroism. The Foundation works to prevent future genocides and raise awareness of the need for a new truth and reconciliation process in Rwanda and the Great Lakes Region of Africa. Thanks to PAVE Board of Director, Kitty Kurth, PAVE’s Angela Rose and Paul Rusesabagina wrote an Opinion Editorial about the gang rapes in the Congo.

Click here to learn more about the issue

Thousands of innocent individuals of both sexes, including children as young as one month old, are the rape targets of rebel groups that originated after the 1994 Rwanda Genocide.

International Day for Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse/Violence

PAVE is happy to support the first annual International Days will be on September 18 and 19, 2010. The motto for the days and the group is: SOLIDARITY! NOT SOLITUDE!

Numerous group and personal activities will be organised around the world to underline, recognize and acknowledge the plight, the healing and numerous issues regarding Male Survivors.
The Council established in January 2010 has representatives who are male survivors from Australia, Canada, France, India, Italy, Malaysia, Mexico and Latin America, South Africa, United States of America and the United Kingdom. The group has a worldwide membership in over twenty five (25) countries. Inuit and Natives of North America are also represented on the Council. A few women and non-survivors are members of the council as advocates of the cause.

Supporters and survivors who want to join the group may do so by signing up at our Facebook site or our Web Page.

CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFO

ANGEL RISING CD NOW AVAILABLE – Limited Edition

Steve Connell at PAVE event in LA

PAVE is pleased to announce the release of the highly anticipated spoken word CD from poet Steve Connell. All tracks are original pieces and inspired by PAVE’s work to shatter the silence of sexual violence. Limited edition – purchase yours today!

"Steve’s performance at PAVE in L.A. was absolutely brilliant! No matter how many times I hear it, you need to know that it changed my life. Drastically."

"Hearing Steve’s poem was more healing than years of therapy."

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE

Steve Connell is the Poetry Slam Champion and 2003 National Champion (team LA). His work has been featured on a wide variety of media outlets, including ABC World News, Good Morning America, MSNBC’s Hardball, HBO’s Def Poetry (twice), Showtime’s Crossover, MTV’s World AIDS Festival, BET’s Lyric Café, as well as Oprah Winfrey’s celebration of Maya Angelou’s 75th birthday and Quincy Jones’ Lifetime Achievement Award celebration. www.stevenconnell.com

CLICK HERE

Donate today to continue our efforts to shatter the silence of sexual violence in your community!

          Sincerely,

Forward email

Safe Haven

July 23, 2010

Golf

E-News

July 2010        Find us on Facebook Follow us on Twitter

2010 Legacy of Women honors 15 women Last year’s Legacy of Women Awards honorees, from L to R:  Christine Cook, Ramona Osburn, Louise Appleman, Nina Jackson and Margo Dean.

Golf

Among the fifteen women who will be honored at SafeHaven’s 18th Legacy of Women Awards luncheon on October 29th are renowned artists, business owners, educators and and community leaders. These women selected represent diverse aspects of the Arts, Business, Education, Health and Human Services and Volunteerism.

The format for this year’s event has changed to include an honoree in each category from each of the following geographic regions: Northeast Tarrant County, Greater Fort Worth and Greater Arlington. This brings the number of women recognized up to fifteen from the five that were previously honored at the event.

"On behalf of the 2010 Legacy of Women Awards Committee, it is a pleasure to announce the names of fifteen exceptional women who will be honored at the 2010 Legacy Awards." said Diane Stow, event chair and Fort Worth, Texas Magazine associate publisher. "We want to acknowledge everyone who took the time to nominate so many incredibly accomplished women, and thank them for their continued support of our mission"

This year’s honorees are:

Arts

Arlington: LeeAnn Chenoweth-Lawson, president, producer and violinist for Timeless Concerts

Fort Worth: Rebecca Low, owner and sculptor at Rebecca Low Sculptural Metal Gallery and Studio.

Northeast Tarrant County: DeeAnn Blair, executive producer at Artisan Center Theate

Business

Arlington: Taylor Gray, owner of The Shoppes at Brownstone Village

Fort Worth: Shirlee Gandy, owner of RPM Commercial

Northeast Tarrant County: Susan Clark, owner of Sweet Memories Cakes and Catering

Education

Mansfield: Dee Lemser, retired teacher from Mansfield ISD

Fort Worth: Mary Cinatl, Director of the Catholic Diocese of Fort worth

Northeast Tarrant County: Janice Kane, Executive Director of the Grapevine-Colleyville ISD Education Foundation

Health & Human Services

Arlington: Donna Bertram, Vice President and Chief Nursing Officer at Texas Health Arlington Memorial Hospital

Fort Worth: Susan Sward-Comunelli, president of the board and medical director of Mothers’ Milk Bank of North Texas

Northeast Tarrant County: Vicki Truitt, State of Texas District 98 representative

Volunteerism

Arlington: Cristy Duke, volunteer for Junior League of Arlington, the Boys and Girls Club, The Oakridge School and Big Brothers and Big Sisters.

Fort Worth: Gail Landreth, volunteer for Historic Fort Worth, Inc., Fort Worth Museum of Science and History, Jewel CharityBall, Junior League of Fort Worth

Northeast Tarrant County: Shirley Schollmeyer, volunteer for the Grapevine-Colleyville ISD, The City of Colleyville, Colleyville Area Chamber of Commerce, the Colleyville Woman’s Club, the Colleyville Garden Club, the Colleyville Community Center, GRACE, and more.

The luncheon will be held at the Omni Hotel in downtown Fort Worth with keynote speaker Royal Chef Darren McGrady, former chef to Princess Diana and Queen Elizabeth.

For sponsorship opportunities, click 

here.

Blast on Berry Street celebrated 22 years, opening of boutique

berry st. blastBerry Good Buys, SafeHaven’s resale shop in Fort Worth, celebrated the grand opening of its Berry Chic Boutique and 22 years of operation on June 5.  Staff and customers also enjoyed an afternoon of karaoke, hotdogs, and great sales.  

Be sure to visit Berry Good Buys and the Berry Chic Boutique soon! It’s at 1701 W. Berry St. in Fort Worth. Musicians donated their time to entertain the crowd and other buisnesses donated services and raffle prizes.

Musicians included:  

Taylor Davis (www.taylordavisfacebook.com), Taylor Ivey, Clayton Graham Fike (www.myspace.com/claytonfikemusic), Tim Miller (http://www.timmiller.com/) and Silent Exit (www.facebook.com/silentexit). Mandee Welch donated services from her company, Let it Be Photography. You can contact her at Mandee Welch 940-577-1373 and letitbephotography@yahoo.com and view the photos here. Media Room Marketing helped book the musicians and can be contacted by visiting www.mediaroommarketing.com or www.facebook.com/mediaroom. The National Cowgirl Museum & Hall of Fame, Mexican Inn Cafe,
Spring Creek Barbeque, Billy Bob’s Texas, Half Price Books, Starplex Cinemas, Mama’s Pizza
Massey’s and La Gardina all donated raffle prizes.

The store also underwent a massive renovation. Walls were knocked down and spaces were expanded … all because of the help of some generous local contractors! SPD Resources, L.P., Bean Electric and Tenant Provision teamed up to renovate the area that is now one big, open space for the furniture sold at the store. Please consider contacting these companies at www.spdresourceslp.com, cbean@beanelectrical.com and pfarr@maveryllc.com if you are thinking of having work done on your place of business — they did a fantastic job!

Childrens program creates

summer fun in the shelter

SafeHaven’s child clients participated in a therapeutic horse-painting class while in the children’s program.

Golf

Summer is the busiest time of year at SafeHaven’s shelters, especially in the children’s program while the kids are out of school. Below is a list of some of the items needed to help make summer in the shelter fun. If you or someone you know can help us find these items at low or no cost, please contact Krista Moffett at 817-535-6462, ext. 101 or

kmoffett@safehaventc.org.

· Bubbles

· Sand art

· Arts and crafts (beads, paint, etc…)

· Sun block & OFF Bug Spray

· Snacks: fruit snacks, capri sun, chips, fruit, bottled water, popcorn, etc.

· Coolers with wheels

· Caps/Hats

SafeHaven’s kids also like to take field trips during the summer months. We are looking for tickets and donations of fun activities such as waterslide rentals, major or minor  league sports games, museums, water parks, restaurants with playgrounds (such as McDonald’s), and any other fun kids’ activities. Contact Krista Moffett at 817-535-6462, ext. 101 or kmoffett@safehaventc.org with ideas. Any suggestions and/or donations will be greatly appreciated!   

SafeHaven participates in Greatest Gift Catalog Ever

ggceSafeHaven was chosen for the second year in a row as one of the participants in the Greatest Gift Catalog Ever. The catalog showcases different ways people can give to the organizations, especially at Christmas. If you would like to order free catalogs for  customers at your place of business, please call Sarah McClellan-Brandt at 817-535-6462, ext. 119 or

smbrandt@safehaventc.org. For more information about the catalog, click here.

Client moves from victim to survivor

Cara arrived at the shelter six months ago with her young child after

suffering a broken wrist and rib at the hands of her abuser. She drove herself to the hospital because she had no one to call. While in the emergency room, a hospital worker contacted the police department on her behalf. While the police searched for the abuser, Cara was referred to SafeHaven. When she called our hotline at 1-877-701-SAFE (7233), she was admitted into the Fort Worth shelter. In the early stages of pregnancy, her injuries caused her to suffer a miscarriage. After recovering, she immediately found a job as an executive assistant. During her stay at the shelter, she took full advantage of SafeHaven’s counseling and therapeutic services. Her young son also received counseling and play therapyand, as a result, his behavior vastly improved. Cara is now residing in her own apartment through SafeHaven’s SafeLiving program and has received Crime Victim’s Compensation. Her remarkable determination has her resolved to create a life of permanent safety for herself and her son.

In case you missed it: 

You can view UT Head Football Coach  Mack Brown’s Legacy of Men speech by clicking

here.

See what Carson Bold had to say about this year’s Lemon Aid stand by clicking here.  

The Star-Telegram’s Melinda Mason mentioned Berry Good Buys as a great place to volunteer in her July 2 article. Click here to read it!

Kroger has added SafeHaven to its Neighbor to Neighbor donation program. This means that when you bring in a letter with SafeHaven’s barcode on it, they will scan it and each time you use your Kroger card a percentage of the proceeds will come to SafeHaven. Click here to view our blog posting on this and print your letter.

Sponsor highlight:

Golf

Minuteman Press

Minuteman Press of Fort Worth has generously sponsored this newsletter. Be sure to say a quick thanks to owner Bill Lynch when you see him around! Or, just visit the Web site at

www.FtWorth.MinutemanPress.com.

Join Our Mailing List

How to make a difference

If you’d like to advance our mission and support SafeHaven’s work with domestic violence victims, there are a variety of ways to help.  

Volunteer:             Contact Krista Moffett at 817-535-6462, ext. 101 or

kmoffett@safehaventc.org You can find volunteer opportunities by clicking "volunteer" on our Web site.
Donate funds:
We accept credit card donations on our website, http://www.safehaventc.org. Just click on "donate" and fill out the form that fills the screen. We also take credit card donations by phone at 817-535-6462. Checks can be sent to:  6815 Manhattan Blvd., Fort Worth, TX 76120.
Donate items:
Drop off donations of clothing, housewares, furniture and other items at Berry Good Buys, 1701 W. Berry Street, Fort Worth, Texas 76110 or at the Arlington Resource Center at 401 W. Sanford, Ste. 1400, Arlington, TX. To arrange a donation pick-up of large items, call 817-921-5898. Also, check out Berry Good Buys’ new Web site at www.berrygoodbuys.com.

Upcoming Events

July 31

New West Gallery in the Fort Worth Stockyards is holding a benefit for SafeHaven. Click

here for details.

September 4

Walk This Way Runway Show and Benefit. For more information, contact neshunlimited@gmail.com.

September 11

Fort Worth Peacemaker, a six-mile obstacle course race, portion of proceeds benefitting SafeHaven. Click here for more information.

October 29

Legacy of Women Awards Luncheon. Click here for more information.

October 29-November 7

HeartCard Shopping Event. Click here for more information.

November 1

Ambucs Golf Tournament benefitting SafeHaven at Timmaron Golf Course. Email thejohnwallace@aol.com for more information.

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survivingSpirit

 

The Surviving Spirit Newsletter – Healing the Heart Through the Creative Arts  –

Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars. – Kahlil Gibran

Hello Folks,                                                                                               June & July issue

Welcome one and all to the latest offering of news, resources, and information from the Surviving Spirit. Summer is officially here and a time to unwind and relax a bit…so with that in mind and with so many people on vacation, it seemed right to combine the months of June & July into one issue.

We’ve held several events recently that have helped the Surviving Spirit in its Mission and Vision of the things we are trying to do through the creative arts in raising awareness on the issues and concerns of trauma, abuse and mental illness. All have been well received and it has brought more folks on board to the newsletter and also helping us in our efforts in other ways. Our website continues to move along in the building process…still more to do, but we are getting there. As the saying goes, “slow but sure”.

Speaking of the website, our News & Events section is up and running, we still have some tweaking to do…but please note: We have two parts to this, one is for matters of interest that pertains specifically to what the Surviving Spirit is doing and the other part is to share information on what other organizations and individuals are doing that concerns their events, conferences, advocacy and creative news, etc.

If you have news or an upcoming event to share, please let us know.  You can ‘check it out’ at www.survivingspirit.com click on News & Events, fill out the form and send us the information you wish to have shared. Thanks!!

And here are some more helpful resources and news from our friends and colleagues:

1] Meg LeDuc who is involved with the Bazelon Center for Mental Health Law has put together a new website and blog called Divinest Sense. It is to be an artistic forum for people who have struggled with a mental illness and who express themselves through the graphic arts, music, writing, video and more. Please visit http://www.divinestsense.org/  to learn more.

2] This is some great news from the folks at Mental Health America – they have launched a new national campaign on the importance of stress and trauma in the development of mental health problems and the need to appropriately treat them in order for people to get better. Called S.T.A.R. of Mine (for Stress, Treatment, Awareness, Recovery), the campaign will raise awareness of the impact of trauma & help remove the stigma attached to it  http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/STAR.

Hmnnn….on a personal note, this cuts to the heart of the matter that helped to shape and start this newsletter and my advocacy efforts many years ago in the early 90’s. I enjoy sharing the news and information of what others are doing – it is a labor of love. But there is a flip side to that; it reminds me of why I and so many others do what we do. The stigma attached to the impact of healing from trauma, abuse and/or “mental illness” only makes one’s healing journey that much harder. So this program from Mental Health America and the efforts of what others are doing will hopefully some day end that stigma and discrimination.

3] Cynther Jones has a radio show that is broadcast down in Texas. She recently launched a new segment called "Mental Health Spotlight," which features a mental health professional or a mental health consumer, monthly. She is also a mental health consumer advocate. The show airs on Thursdays, at 11:30 a.m., on KGLD 1330 AM. Listen world-wide, online, at www.kgld.org  This is a Gospel station, but the program is secular.

I had the good fortune to be on her show several weeks ago…we touched upon many of the issues that pertain to those of us affected by mental health concerns and the impact upon us as parents and so much more. If you would like to be on her show, write to her at

cyntherjonesshow@yahoo.com or call the radio station at (903) 526-1330

I hope to post a recording of the show I was on to my website soon.

4] Fia Marie has a website, The Borderline Experience – BPD Up Close & Personal and a blog that is a great resource and place for peer support around the issues of Borderline Personality Disorder.   http://theborderlineexperience.com/
http://ontheborderlineblog.wordpress.

5] Courage Network – http://www.couragenetwork.com/  A community for domestic violence organizations, professionals, advocates and survivors. And a resource for victims, family and friends dealing with domestic violence in their personal lives.

6] Corinna West, Certified Peer Specialist also has a website Human Hand Wordworks for her Motivational speaking, spoken word poetry, and catalyst for change – www.corinnawest.com

I’m also excited that I will be co-presenting with Corinna and Gayle Bluebird [http://www.bluebirdconsultants.com ]a workshop – Developing Your Art Practice into a Self-Supporting Business to Promote Social Justice at the Alternatives Conference in Anaheim, CA Sept. 29th – Oct. 3 rd 2010. Learn more about the conference at: www.power2u.org/alternatives2010/index.html

7] We thought it would be helpful to share some resources to help those who are writers, would be authors and poets with some information that could help them in their creative endeavors. Self-publishing is a great thing for those of us who are creative, but it still helps to have some basic guidelines to follow and learn from. With that in mind here are a few websites to help you –

What is Good Writing? www.ttms.org/writing_quality/writing_quality.htm

And for our musician friends – www.Cdbaby.com

Please note I’ve been in music all of my life…I’ve seen the best and the worst of those in the ‘business’ taking advantage of us. CDBaby does indeed help independent musicians and bands. They have helped me to sell my music worldwide with credit card orders and also getting me connected into I-Tunes and so many other Internet sites that have sold my music. Payments to me are timely, but what they also do is share LOTS of helpful resources and tips for promoting and selling your music – so do check them out.

If any of our artist friends have some helpful resources to share, please let us know.

8] Sheva Burton shares this news from ‘across the pond’:

UK RALLY AGAINST CHILD ABUSE, Trafalgar Square, London, Saturday August 7th, 2010

Start – 1:00pm Members of the public will be invited to take the stand to voice their views and share their stories. Finish – 5:00pm
The UK Rally Against Child Abuse is an opportunity for people from all walks of life to join together not only in raising awareness of this most serious issue but also to show victims/survivors/families that you/we/they are not alone.
Everyone is welcome and encouraged to join us – survivors, non-survivors, friends, families, children, supporters and support organizations, anyone who is against child abuse and wants to make a difference.
(Please note: this event will be filmed) speeches aired with permission

http://www.facebook.com/topic.php?topic=15786&post=137086&uid=123328360815#!/event.php?eid=121663397854205&ref=mf

9] Upcoming event information for the 5th Vital Cycles Retreat being held in Fredericksburg, VA  August 6-8 2010,  can be found at www.vitalcycles.org

The purpose of Vital Cycles is to empower those who seek joy in living while healing the emotional impact of trauma.

Take care, Mike

ps. Please share this with your friends & if you have received this in error, please let me know.

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.

~Martin Luther King, Jr.

A diagnosis is not a destiny.

www.mskinnermusic.com – Hope, Healing, & Help for Trauma, Abuse, & Mental Health through music, resources, & advocacy

www.myspace.com/michaelskinnermusic – musical endeavors only

www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=635415804%20  Facebook – for friends, music, & advocacy!!

www.youtube.com/mcstrain – live performance of "Brush Away Your Tears" from TV show interview

mikeskinner@comcast.net 603-625-2136    38 River Ledge Drive, Goffstown, NH 03045

www.michaelskinner.net – new site for public speaking & music presentation on healing for trauma, abuse, & mental health.

"BE the change you want to see in the world." Mohandas Gandhi

Please click this image to download the pdf newsletter.

Enchanted Makeovers PDF 
Newsletter

We have some exciting news. Starting with our July issue, we’ve changed our format for our newsletters. From now on, you’ll click on the image or the link below the image to download a beautiful, high resolution PDF newsletter. We think you’ll enjoy keeping up with news at Enchanted Makeovers this way.
In the future, we will also be archiving all newsletter on our web site for your convenience. We’ll be starting with this issue.
We hope you enjoy our new format.
With Love,
Terry

Enchanted Makeovers

12663 Hipp

Taylor, Michigan 48180

734-776-0848 http://www.enchantedmakeovers.org/pdf/em-news-201007.pdf

Please join our mailing list and also encourage others to join. There are so many ways that you can help Enchanted Makeovers, and spreading the word is one of the most important!

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P.A.V.E.

July 6, 2010

 

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PAVE

PAVE Newsletter

Shatter the Silence of Sexual Violence

June 2010

In this Issue

:: International Dialogue for Action

:: Booking for 2010

:: Save the Date!

:: Security on Campus, Inc.

:: Angel Rising CD

:: PAVE Library Series

:: Planning Committee Members Needed

Dear Jacki m,

PAVE shatters the silence of sexual violence through social awareness, educational outreach, and legislative efforts. By being both prevention and awareness focused, PAVE works on all fronts to end sexual violence affecting men, women and children throughout the globe.
We use art, education and action to challenge cultural norms that encourage violence and ignore the spectrum of sexual abuse.  We create an awareness and response to any injustices victims, survivors and their communities suffer.
You’re invited to join this important work – learn more today!

Cecilia Attias Foundation for Women

DIALOGUE FOR ACTION 

Dialogue for Action

Cecilia Attias, former First Lady of France, founded the Cecilia Attias Foundation for Women who hosted the first annual international forum dedicated to helping women around the world. It was an invitation only event and Angela Rose, PAVE Founder, was in attendance. The goal of the event was to build a dynamic community of organizations from every continent that champion the cause of women’s dignity, equality and well-being. More info

Cecilia Attias

Angela Rose
BOOKING SPEAKING ENGAGEMENTS FOR FALL & SPRING 2010

Angela Rose’s decade of work on the issue of sexual violence has made her a highly-respected, engaging speaker and expert on sexual assault and violence prevention. She is also widely recognized as an advocate for survivor empowerment. Angela’s efforts have been profiled by CNN, The Today Show, The Montel Williams Show, CosmoGirl, Girl’s Life magazine and in newspapers nationwide.

More info

SAVE THE DATE

NOVA

30th NOVA Conference

Date: August 22-25, 2010
Location: Salt Lake City, Utah
Purpose: The conference will focus on enhancing your the skills to work with victims. There are plenty of opportunities for all to refine your professional capacities and develop specialized skills.
More information available

National Sexual Assault Conference

Date: September 1-3, 2010
Location: L.A., California
Purpose: The California Coalition Against Sexual Assault will be hosting the 2010 national conference
Learn more

15th International Conference on Violence, Abuse and Trauma (IVAT)

Date: Sept. 12-15, 2010

Location: San Diego, CA

Purpose: The mission is to provide professional training and information dissemination to improve the quality of life for those affected by violence, abuse, and trauma on local, national, and international levels; PAVE is a collaborating organization

PAVE’s ANGELA ROSE WILL BE THERE!

Security on Campus
Emergency Guidebook
Security on Campus Inc. is offering a customizable Emergency Guidebook for you to tailor to your campus community! Learn more here!

Date: July 7-8, 2010
Location: Philadelphia, PA
Partnership: University of Pennsylvania’s Division of Public Safety
Date: July 19-20, 2010
Location:Chicago, IL
Partnership: Northwestern University’s Police Department

QUICK Links

JOIN PAVE ON FACEBOOK

PAVE’s Website

ANGELA’s Website

ANGEL RISING CD NOW AVAILABLE – Limited Edition

Steve Connell at PAVE event in LA

PAVE is pleased to announce the release of the highly anticipated spoken word CD from poet Steve Connell. All tracks are original pieces and inspired by PAVE’s work to shatter the silence of sexual violence. Limited edition – purchase yours today!

"Steve’s performance at PAVE in L.A. was absolutely brilliant! No matter how many times I hear it, you need to know that it changed my life. Drastically."

"Hearing Steve’s poem was more healing than years of therapy."

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE

Steve Connell is the Poetry Slam Champion and 2003 National Champion (team LA). His work has been featured on a wide variety of media outlets, including ABC World News, Good Morning America, MSNBC’s Hardball, HBO’s Def Poetry (twice), Showtime’s Crossover, MTV’s World AIDS Festival, BET’s Lyric Café, as well as Oprah Winfrey’s celebration of Maya Angelou’s 75th birthday and Quincy Jones’ Lifetime Achievement Award celebration. www.stevenconnell.com

CLICK HERE

PAVEs Library Series to Shatter the Silence of Sexual Violence

Did you know that 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys are sexually abused before they are 18 years old? Would you like to help STOP that statistic?

PAVE: Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment is celebrating our 10 Year Anniversary by creating a multi-media library series of violence prevention material. Our first DVD, "Transition to Survivor," has been used by universities and military bases across the country to raise awareness and prevent sexual crimes. WE NEED YOUR HELP to continue this important work.

ANY DONATION AMOUNT IS WELCOME! We offer special perks for donations in these ranges:

  • $100: your name will be listed in the rolling credits
  • $250: Above PLUS a signed copy of the DVD
  • $500: Above PLUS a special thank you on our website
  • $1,000: Above PLUS your name alone paused on screen during credits
  • $2,500: Above PLUS your name or company logo featured on the front of the DVD packaging of our 2 new films, thanked in the beginning of the film, plus at the end in the credits.

CLICK HERE AND PLEASE HELP US SPREAD THE WORD!

PLANNING COMMITTEE MEMBERS NEEDED FOR 2011 EVENTS

BROOKLYN, NEW YORK – Spring 2011

ARTS FOR AWARENESS

Working with MTV’s Sarah Rice, PAVE is planning an Arts for Awareness event to be held at the Knitting Factory in Brooklyn featuring an eclectic mix of artists, silent auction and celebrity appearances.

LOS ANGELES, CA – WINTER 2011

PAVE GALA

After receiving wonderful feedback from last year’s Removing the Mask red carpet event in Los Angeles, PAVE’s team has decided to hold it’s second gala in Los Angeles. Last year featured internationally acclaimed author Dave Pelzer, author of A Child Called IT as well as dance and an original spoken word piece from poet Steve Connell.

*IF YOU WANT TO VOLUNTEER AS A PLANNING COMMITTEE MEMBER FOR EITHER EVENT, PLEASE EMAIL: INFO@PAVINGTHEWAY.NET

Donate today to continue our efforts to shatter the silence of sexual violence in your community!

          Sincerely,

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Vote for Lisa J smith

July 6, 2010

Lisa J. Smith


Wooohooo!
What are the chances…
two contests at once!
LIVE with Regis and Kelly
"Women of Radio Co-host for a Day Search 2010

Is there a female radio broadcaster who you think would make a great television personality?
We’re inviting you to nominate a broadcaster you would like to see guest co-host with Regis for a day!
Click Here for the Official Guidelines.
Hurry, the deadline is noon ET on July 16, 2010!
You can vote once a day!
CLICK HERE TO NOMINATE ME AS YOUR BROADCASTER
to Co-host with Regis!
INFO YOU NEED:
Nominee must be nominated by a home listener ("nominator").
Nominator must provide the name of the nominated Broadcaster:
LISA J. SMITH
The radio station call letters: 
WOMC 104.3 HD3
City and state of the station where the nominee works:
Ferndale, MI
If possible, a web address or link to picture,
biography and a video or audio clip of the nominee may be included:
http://www.lisajnow.com
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1Ae5obN0wo

Please forward to your friends and family and help me promote it as much as possible!
Forward this email to a Friend
I NEED YOU!

Join my Facebook page to view my events, personal pictures, find out about  upcoming guest’s on the shows and read my ponderings!

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Lisa J. Smith can be heard on:
CBS Radio The Sky
Lisa J. NOW!
3-6 pm ET Mon, Tues, Thurs, Fri
AOL Radio
Yahoo Radio
HD3 104.3 Detroit
HD3 98.5 Boston
HD3  KJAQ Seattle
http://www.newskyradio.com
Achieve Radio
Lisa J. NOW!
Wednesday 8 pm ET
http://www.achieveradio.com
Michigan Saver Radio
Host of Michigan Classifieds
12-1 pm ET
WYCD 99.5 HD3
http://www.michigansaver.com

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Lisa J. Smith

31100 Telegraph Rd Suite 150

Bingham Farms, Michigan 48025

248 593 5227

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Modern B*A*G Ladies

July 6, 2010

Modern B*A*G Ladies


Auto Pilot into the Mens Room

Posted: 01 Jul 2010 10:05 PM PDT

Nothing will give you tunnel vision like four pregnancies and sucking down Minnesota’s version of Seven Eleven’s Big Slurpee. It’s 250 miles into the 286 mile trip and I must say the words he dreads most. "Tom, I need to go to the bathroom."  What is about men and road trips? Their inner race car driver comes out.  "I was on a record pace. Seriously, can’t you make it 30 more miles.  I told you not to drink that huge cup of iced tea." (image provided under creative commons license flickr user smaedli)
"Um….. No!"  You know the feeling.  It’s like one minute dry as a desert, over-filled water balloon the next.  Your insides are holding onto the knotted end as it hangs lower with each targeted pothole the husband conveniently hits like a down hill skier making every gate.  "No talking, joking or laughing. Mom’s concentrating."  One more jolt and it will certainly burst.  We’ve made the trip to my parents 100’s of times and I’ve been in every bathroom along the way, dirty and clean. I see the sign.  It’s a beacon of relief.  "Tom, next exit.  Don’t you dare drive past."
The Potty Dance
I walk into the gas station/restaurant/truck stop as casual as possible.  Ho Hum. Don’t mind me, cool mama coming though. Great, I’ve got to sneeze. Casually stop. Bring the knees together.  Squeeze.  Sneeze.  I sprint the last 10 feet to to the ladies room. Damn it’s locked. I turn to check the mens room.  And wouldn’t you know, it appears hubby beats me to the door. TIME FOR THE POTTY DANCE. "Doing the potty dance. Doing potty dance."  Just when you think you couldn’t make it another second the bathroom is available.  I’ll spare you my embarrassing pee in my pants for another post.
It’s interesting how my brain stores the maps to every ladies rooms I’ve ever used.  In the door, take a right, then a left, straight back.  For instance, the ladies room, at an office where I used to work, was always on the right and the mens room was always on the left.  It was a pretty big office and each paired restrooms were laid out this way.  A year ago they downsized and moved the corporate office.  I don’t work at the corporate office any longer, but occasionally need to spend the day there.  On one of those day, soon after arriving the morning tea runs its course and I make my way to the right hand ladies room.  Door open.  Man washing hands.  Dang!  Who is the heck changes a right turning ladies room into a left turning ladies room?
Today, I stopped at the busiest convenient store/gas station in town, to use the restroom.  They had remodeled some months back and guess what?  They turned their left turned ladies room into a right turned ladies room.  Door open. Urinal.  Palm. Forehead. Smack!
There’s this other time when the door back into the office from the engineering lab was one of four identical looking doors.  Yep you know the story.  That makes 3 times I’ve accidentally walked into the mens restroom.
Signs, Maps, GPS Systems

Now wouldn’t it make more sense to have a sign like this posted outside.  It would keep the men out and women would definitely know that room was their room.  Another piece of advise to architects on proper sign placement.  Put the sign on the door.  Not to the side.  That just makes me second guess which door it is. (cartoon provided by HikingArtist.com)
Today when I planted my eyes on that urinate I thought to myself, "I wonder if I’ve gone into the mens room and not realized it."  No really, I thought, "In what other areas of my life am I on auto pilot, ignoring the signs" 
It’s so easy to follow our pre-subscribed maps.  Safe, familiar, predictable seems to be the only logical course to take.  I have a map for that.  Two blocks, left, two blocks, right, 6 miles, right, 10 miles, right, 5 blocks, left,2 blocks, right into the parking lot.  Sure my eyes are on the road, but guess what? I don’t look at the signs anymore.  No need. I know the way too well.
I go to a lot of soccer games at remote soccer fields in towns I’ve never been.  I take a map, use my GPS and I follow the signs.  Sometimes the maps and the GPS don’t agree.  Almost always the signs are right.  Some of them are small and hard to read, which means I have to slow down to read them.  I’ve never not gotten un-lost and the kids have always made the game.
Here’s me in auto pilot mode.  There are sure signs of me not facing my fears and traveling outside of my auto pilot map.

  • Quick to anger and unwilling to stop for potty breaks for fear of not breaking my own record.  Its all about me.
  • I don’t dance and there is no laughter
  • I procrastinate by doing busy work
  • I own stuff I don’t need or have a personal connection
  • There’s a toy box full of McDonald’s Happy Meal Toys
  • We didn’t own a dog
  • I don’t listen
  • I raise my voice 
  • I defined my quality of life by my income
  • I thought when girls didn’t go the college they got married

We’ve reached the (dead) end……
Here’s some food for thought.   Leave the map at home. Set out on an adventure and follow the signs.  Don’t be afraid of getting lost. Flip a coin. Left is heads, right is tails.  Oh and before your go, DRINK A BIG OLE 44 OUNCE CUP OF SOMETHING, GET PREPARED TO  LAUGH YOUR ASS OFF AND THEN PEE YOUR PANTS!!

Modern B*A*G Ladies


Comming Soon – Discover Your B*a*g Scavenger Hunt

Posted: 04 Jul 2010 11:09 AM PDT

A Tote B*a*g that’s a Traveling Sanctuary ~ You’re the Traveling Sanctuary


A Tote B*a*g that coaches ~ It’s not a Coach Bag


A Tote B*a*g that reminds you to fuel yourself first ~ Self Care, Not Selfish Care


A Tote B*a*g that is a conversation piece ~ It voices your passions and starts a conversation


A Tote B*a*g that supports the empowerment of women.


Discover Your B*a*g ~ We want to share your story.  Your B*a*g fuels the Believe Act Go Traveling Sanctuary of others.

Proceeds of tote bag sales benefit Enchanted Makeovers and The Angela Shelton Foundation, two non-profit organizations that empower healing and leading joyful lives.

Modern B*A*G Ladies


The Best Fuel is FUN & FREE

Posted: 05 Jul 2010 11:19 AM PDT

Yes, it’s true, the best fuel is free.  That is, fuel for your Believe Act Go Traveling Sanctuary.  And a Victoria Secret Catalog Contains Free Fuel.

Fuel – Intangible energy you generate from with in your feminine power.  It is eco-friendly and infinitely renewable.  Your joy and love shared with others fuels the fuel, multiplying the fuel.  It’s a beautiful cycle.

Case in point:

  • One Daughter
  • One Mom
  • One Friend
  • Friend’s kitchen
  • One Victoria Secret Catalog

Passing the time, waiting to savory an amazing Fourth of July meal I flip through a Victory Secret catalog, sitting on the kitchen island counter top."Paige, assuming I am 50 pounds lighter and would look fabulous in any of these outfits, pick which outfit I would choose for myself.  Don’t point it out until I tell you I’ve made my decision."
You’re sitting, waiting for an appointment or your child’s activity. Your riding in your car.  It’s seemingly wasted idle time, but in reality it’s the prime time to have fun and learn something about your friends and family.  It’s free time, literally free fuel time.
Taking turns picking our favorite outfits was a fun game.  I think we had a accuracy rate of 80%. "Why did you pick that?" I learned more about how her outer style reflects her inner spirit; earthy, eclectic, whimsy. 
Sharing and having fun is the best fuel.  You don’t need to spend money going to the movies, bowling or going on expensive vacations to fuel the fun.  What fun, free games do you play?  When and where?  What do you learn about your friends and family members?   

Send the message forward to your friends and family…LadyJ